Just can't get along with someone?
If we are having trouble getting along with someone or several people, it is definitely time to look at our self. The experience we are having is our experience, our feelings, our thoughts.
We can't make other people act how we want them to, and if our contentment or goals are at the mercy of other people acting how we want them to, we stand to experience a vast variety of negative emotions, which, we can project or blame on the other party. This is our mistake!
The answer is, take ownership and take responsibility or your own experience.
If our desired outcome is to interact in a positive way, to have healthy relationships at work or home, to get along with clients, customers, colleges, partners and people across the board, then this will be the experience we will have. If we have a negative experience with someone, it is because we have scanned their information through our mental filters and had a certain emotional and physical experience with that.
Release the judgement and the expectations and replace it with genuinely trying to understand the other parties mind. You don’t have to accept bad behaviour; you just alter your experience with it. Adopt the habit of taking responsibility for how you feel. If we are angry or holding negative judgement, understand we have control to release this... "let go". Stretch yourself and grow your skills to a new level that supports letting go of negative judgement and taking more responsibility for genuinely desiring positive outcomes and interactions.
A great deal of our conflicts or mis communications are a result of us not taking more responsibility to effect a better outcome. Though we feel justified relinquishing our responsibility and blaming someone or something else.
Ask yourself, what could I do or think in this moment that will be more likely deliver a more positive experience and outcome?
At the very least there is always something we can learn.
By Ros Loxton – Great Thinking Life and Results Coaching www.greatthinking.net.au
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